A Networking Survival Guide for Introverts

How I Stepped Out of My Comfort Zone and What I Learned

Networking as an Introvert – Mission Impossible?

Networking events can feel like a nightmare for introverts. Small talk, big crowds, and constant social interaction can be exhausting—at least for me! But what if networking wasn’t as overwhelming as I thought? What if I could simply be myself and still succeed?

Last week, I learned that networking doesn’t have to mean meaningless chit-chat. It can be done in your own way—even as an introvert.

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The Initial Anxiety: Stepping Out of My Comfort Zone

This year, I started a new role at work, focusing on a completely new customer segment. While exciting and motivating, this also came with challenges—like attending networking events. I had successfully avoided these events for years, but now they were part of my job. Last week, I attended my first one.

I am an introvert. This means that while I am socially skilled, social situations drain my energy. Working in B2B sales is already mentally demanding, so attending events outside of work has always felt exhausting.

I have no problem with public speaking. In fact, I’m quite good at it. I can confidently speak to a large audience—I have led training sessions and given presentations at partner events. As long as I have a clear agenda or an expert role, I feel comfortable.

However, I always viewed networking events as pointless. Just a lot of smiling and asking strangers, “How are you?” without really listening to the answer. Just empty words with no real meaning—not exactly my thing. (And very strange for Finns!) I also never felt confident bringing up my expertise or my company naturally in a casual conversation.

Attending this networking event felt like a major challenge. The only reason I went was that it was now a required part of my job.

I didn’t plan any strategy for the evening. My only goal was to survive and have at least one meaningful conversation with someone I didn’t know before.

So, I took on the mindset of a confident B2B sales professional and stepped into the event (luckily, there were also expert speakers, so I got to sit and listen, too!).

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Taking on the Expert Role – A Game-Changer

I realized that I could take on my expert role even in one-on-one conversations.

There was food and drinks available, and people naturally gathered around small tables. These moments provided an easy way to introduce myself to the people around me and ask, “What does your company do?”

I treated each conversation as if it were a B2B sales discussion. I asked questions that were both genuinely interesting and naturally opened the door for me to introduce my expertise and my company.

As I found a way to present myself in a way that felt natural, conversations became easier, and I started to relax.

Surprisingly, the evening was much more successful than I expected—my goal was just to survive! But the conversations actually led to something: I got a couple of new contacts, and we agreed to follow up the next week.

It felt amazing to realize that I had found a way to network comfortably and that the event turned out far better than I had imagined!

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Lessons Learned for Future Networking Events

This experience taught me that my assumptions were wrong. My strength lies in the fact that I know how to present myself confidently in an expert role. Once I leaned into that strength, networking felt much more natural.

Next time, I will go into a networking event with a lighter mindset. I will step into a role that suits me best—as an expert—even if I don’t have an official role at the event. My ability to ask good questions and steer conversations naturally will help my expertise come across without forcing it.

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My Networking Tips for Introverts

I am not an expert after just one event—I still have a lot to learn. However, this one successful experience taught me some valuable lessons:

1. Identify Your Strengths and Use Them

– Introverts are often great listeners and can have deep, meaningful conversations. Use this as your advantage in networking.
– If you are an expert in something, lean into it. Think about how you can approach conversations in a way that feels natural to you.

2. Start with Simple Conversation Starters

– You don’t need to overthink your approach—just have a few easy questions ready:

• "What does your company do?"

• "How did you get into this field?"

• "What has been the most interesting part of this event for you?"
  – People love talking about themselves, so asking genuine questions is a great way to start a conversation.

3. Find a Networking Style That Works for You

– If small talk feels shallow and meaningless, reframe networking as a valuable exchange of ideas.
– Instead of forcing yourself into awkward conversations, approach networking with curiosity: What can you learn from others? What valuable insights can you share in return?

4. Use Natural Opportunities to Connect

– Networking doesn’t mean standing around and forcing conversations.
– Look for moments when people naturally talk to each other, such as during meals or coffee breaks.
– After an interesting talk, sit next to someone and ask what they thought about the speaker’s points—this opens a conversation naturally.

5. Set Realistic and Personal Goals

– You don’t need to walk away with dozens of new contacts. Even one or two meaningful conversations make the event worthwhile.
– If the event feels overwhelming, make a deal with yourself: have a few valuable conversations, then leave when you feel ready. Often, once you start, it won’t feel as difficult anymore.

6. Remember That Others May Feel Nervous Too

– Not everyone is naturally outgoing. Many others feel uncomfortable at networking events, and sometimes, you might be the one who helps break the ice.

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Why Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone is Worth It

Looking back, it’s almost funny how I had convinced myself that networking events were “not for me.” I had told myself that I didn’t need them because I was already doing well in my job. I had successfully avoided them for years.

But I was wrong.

This experience showed me that I can network in my own way, without changing my personality. I don’t need to become an extrovert—I can use my strengths instead. My ability to listen, ask good questions, and engage in meaningful conversations is enough.

Next time I walk into a networking event, I won’t feel the same fear. I now know that I don’t have to be the loudest person in the room. It’s enough to be present, ask the right questions, listen, and let the conversations flow naturally.

This was just the first step, but now I know that the next networking event will already feel much easier.

And you can do it too. 💙

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